A quiet manager rebels against his wife’s violence

by Ivano Abbadessa - 2015.03.17
A quiet manager rebels against his wife’s violence
  • Share on Facebook Share on Twitter Share on Whatsapp
  • Print

"Men shouldn’t be ashamed of the world knowing that they have been assaulted by a woman," says Ken Gregory, 65, who suffered 1st and 2nd degree burns on 14% of his body in March 2014 after his second wife, Teresa Gilbertson, had deliberately poured a kettle of boiling water on his neck. This was after Maxime Gaget, another male victim of female domestic violence who broke the taboo of silence surrounding the problem of men abused by their partners.

"I never imagined that such a thing could happen to me," said Mr Gregory in a recent interview with the BBC. This retired English manager had met Ms. Gilbertson after the death of his first wife with whom he had lived for 30 years. His ordeal was the culmination of weeks of aggression and verbal abuse, which was triggered by his decision to pay tribute to his late wife on the anniversary of her death. One day, at the end of yet another quarrel, instead of coming back with the tea, which he had told her to make, Ms. Gilbertson came back with a kettle full of boiling water and poured the entire contents on his neck. "It was an unbearable and excruciating pain. I had never experienced anything like it," admitted Mr Gregory.

"It may seem strange to many that a strong, mature man can be the victim of female violence. But it's all true." For this reason, Ken Gregory decided to talk about his personal tragedy, even revealing his scars, to send a clear message to men who endure physical and psychological abuse by wives, lovers and companions: follow the same advice that organisations give to female victims of violence: don't be afraid to report it!

He believes that a radical change of attitude in society is necessary so that people understand that domestic abuse can affect anyone. Statistics bear this out as, according to the Mankind initiative, a British organisation that supports battered men, 38% of victims of domestic violence are male. Men are also almost twice as likely as women to tell no one of the attacks. Only 10% of them seek help from a doctor or the police.

Published in Domestic violence.
Related:
  • The way women abuse men sexually

    It is an argument not so widely explored, but also men suffer sexual abuse from women. Who use several ways of coercion to force men to have sex with them. A truth emerged from a paper released by the University of Lancaster. According to which, three are the most preferred Read More.

  • Identikit of women murdered in the United States

    In the USA, more than half of the homicides committed against women are by their partner (or “ex”). Or, at least this is what has emerged in the Center for Disease Control and Prevention’s most recent report. Statistics were analyzed regarding domestic violence cases that took place in 18 states during Read More.

  • Men and women suffer equally after sexual abuse

    Male victims of sexual violence suffer in the same way that women do. A study at Florida Atlantic University dispels the myth that the so-called stronger sex reacts better or in a more aggressive way to this kind of abuse. Based on an analysis of a large sample of individuals Read More.

  • It is considered maltreatment in the family even when you don’t live under the same roof

    In Italy, the crime of maltreatment in the family can also apply to a de facto couple with children. That is also if the abuse occurred when the two were no longer living under the same roof. This was the ruling of the Court of Cassation, in pointing out that Read More.

  • In Italy Public defenders supplied for all victims of stalking

    In Italy, all victims of stalking have the right to a public defender, regardless of their income. The same is true for victims of domestic abuse, female genital mutilation, or sexual violence. The Supreme Court ruled in favor of a woman who had been denied the right to a hearing Read More.

  • Sentence against Italy for not having avoided another act of domestic violence

    A sentence without precedence. The European Court of Human Rights, has, in fact, condemned Italy for not having acted in time, to prevent yet another of many cases of domestic violence against a woman by her husband: despite the numerous complaints that had been filed. In this specific case, in Read More.